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Say whhhatt?!

Leave it to the Lord to use a VEGGIE TALES movie to SCHOOL me.. for those of you who may be unfamiliar with what I’m referring to it’s pretty much a kid’s version of different Bible stories narrated by VEGETABLES it’s actually pretty legit ha.

So anyway.. this one happened to be about JOB. Job was an elite example of what an upright man before the Lord should look like.. so why then did this man Job, have (EVERYTHING GOD HAD BLESSED HIM WITH) GET STRIPPED AWAY. I think even those who don’t know the Bible all that well, still know about Job’s story in some way or another. The Lord revealed to me the power of being honest in the midst of our relationship with Him no matter the circumstances of our life. As humans it’s only natural to be confused, frustrated, grieved, and ready to give up// and in to sin, anger and rebellion against the Lord at times of great suffering in life.

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You see I truly believe the Lord HONORS HONESTY. There are plenty of examples to back this up all over the Bible. David cries out in anguish and agony over his heartbreak of his sin and the evils of this world throughout PSALMS. Moses, Abraham, Mary, Zechariah; are just a few other examples of those who were CALLED BY THE LORD to trust Him and fulfill his work; and yet HONESTLY spoke to him in question, concern, and fears that the Lord might be unaware of their shortcomings. Paul constantly cried out to the Lord in honest prayer and affliction. Peter, ha who can forget him!! Peter was HONEST like a small CHILD.. NO FILTER.. (totally RELATE).

God already knows the deepest cries of our hearts, but there is such freedom and healing in EXPRESSING them out loud to ourselves and the Lord. I know I so often have to be careful in my honesty to pray for humility and fresh perspective because I can get caught up in anger, pride and bitterness wondering why God chose to allow so much hurt in my life while blessing others. You must be so careful to not allow your honesty to be a judgement seat in your heart to compare your life to others and to tell the Lord you know what is best for others and yourself.

I am so frustrated with the Lord in this season of my life… I feel like all I do is cry, everything I touch turns to crap, and I’ve never felt more unsure of myself and stuck in life. I expected tihngs to be so different; and if they have to be ilke this I wish I could see more of God’s hand in it all. My biggest fear is that my past, present and future will be in vain and I keep telling God if I must suffer such a pain; can it at least be for your glory. HOWEVER, if I truly believed God was sovereign over my life I would TRUST AND SURRENDER Him to do WHATEVER he chooses with me.

All this to say… JUST BE HONEST… God can and will handle it… He loves us and is more than willing to wrestle it out. HOWEVER.. as I try to do this daily.. may you too.. REMEMBER.. that God doesn’t owe us any explanation. All he does and allows, does not take away from his character and that he is still a GOOD GOD. Job voiced his real confusion, hurt, longing, and frustration with he Lord but NEVER ONCE DID HE GIVE INTO DENYING GOD. Job, although he did not fully understand, knew that the same good God that GAVE could still be good and take away; and that God must have a reason beyond his understanding. Job chose to honor and trust the Lord even in the midst of loosing EVERYTHING. (especially when his own WIFE told him to just curse the Lord and his friends forsook him) Job lost his house, livestock (which was your lively-hood and provision back then) his family, his health and so much more. JOB was also blessed seven times over after this all because the Lord honored his faith, righteousness no matter the circumstances, and Job’s desire to love and trust the Lord no matter his lack of understanding.

42 Then Job answered the Lord and said:

“I know that you can do all things,
    and that no purpose of yours can be thwarted.
‘Who is this that hides counsel without knowledge?’
Therefore I have uttered what I did not understand,
    things too wonderful for me, which I did not know.
‘Hear, and I will speak;
    I will question you, and you make it known to me.’
I had heard of you by the hearing of the ear,
    but now my eye sees you;
therefore I despise myself,
    and repent[a] in dust and ashes.”………

……..10 And the Lord restored the fortunes of Job, when he had prayed for his friends. And the Lord gave Job twice as much as he had before. 11 Then came to him all his brothers and sisters and all who had known him before, and ate bread with him in his house. And they showed him sympathy and comforted him for all the evil[b] that the Lord had brought upon him. And each of them gave him a piece of money[c] and a ring of gold.

12 And the Lord blessed the latter days of Job more than his beginning. And he had 14,000 sheep, 6,000 camels, 1,000 yoke of oxen, and 1,000 female donkeys.
Puzzle Pieces..

For the few of you that may be blessed by reading this AMEN and thanks for taking the time to share. I love to write because my brain is constantly on hyper-drive and it helps me to pour out and ponder and even look back on just how far the Lord has taken me… since it seems so much easier to forget!

I recently decided to start doing puzzles… I know nerdy but seriously it’s been amazing. I tend to do so much better when involved in activities that keep me thinking, logical and help me to focus. So with that being said.. I hate puzzles okay maybe not hate but my goodness they drive me nuts!

I don’t understand why God has allowed my life to be the puzzle it has.. but as my favorite Author and God fearing Christian woman ELISABETH ELLIOT puts it..

  • "God is God, and since he is god, he is worthy of my worship and my service. I will find rest nowhere else but in his will, and that will is necessarily infinitely, immeasurably, unspeakably beyond my largest notions of what he is up to."

The closer you look at the puzzle or zone in on finding just 1 piece it seems almost impossible and your eyes go cross-eyed and everything blurs okay maybe not but seriously it doesn’t really help. So while working on my puzzle this week trying to lose myself in it; trying mot to think about how much things are not working out quite how I imagined them to be at this stage in my life, or even yet STILL SEARCHING FOR THAT ONE MISSING PUZZLE PIECE… the Lord was gracious to meet me RIGHT WHERE I WAS..

Long story short.. The Lord revealed to me that instead of focusing on the one piece missing; I should’ve instead taken a step back and looked at the puzzle in a whole picture kind of way. I was amazed at how much progress I had made and how even with the missing pieces I could see the start of something beautiful working together.

Although Jesus is concerned about the details of our lives… He is able to look at every facet of our life from a removed view… or more to say a whole view since the Lord is far from removed in our lives. Jesus sees what the finished product looks like especially when we can’t. He urges us to simply continue to trust Him, one PIECE AT A TIME.. and be grateful for the moments when he reveals to us a little more of the finished product but to infinitely trust Him no matter what.

You see, the minute I took my eyes off the missing pieces I was able to bask in the goodness of having completed as much as I had. I was able to enjoy the puzzle AS IS; rather than becoming frustrated and angry with what was not yet completed. Same goes for this life we are living.

Jesus promises to wipe away every one of our tears one day.  I pray that comforts us all.

We are to be proud of who we are and how God created us. We live in such a cruel broken world that despises God’s Truth and Light especially those it emits from! The lord loves us even when this world doesn’t!! I have been struggling all my life to accept this truth because of all the rejection, abandonment, and hurt that I have experienced throughout my years of life. I have had to learn not to play the victim card and to accept responsibility for whatever may come my way. The lord knows this world will reject me but he is not concerned about that, He is more concerned with the posture of my heart towards people especially in those hurtful situations. I can’t control how others will treat me but I CAN CONTROL how I RESPOND. The brokenness in another person does not DEFINE me. If they choose to not accept me or if worse yet I become attached and intimate with them whether friends or a significant other and they then abandon me or reject me, I should be able to forgive myself for past mistakes made because it says in the Bible when I accepted Jesus Christ as my savior I was then already forgiven. Its my pride that says Jesus dying on the cross is still somehow not enough for my sins and mistakes and if you feel the same it is time to repent and HUMBLY ACCEPT  the Lord’s love, grace, truth acceptance, mercy and more!! Those people may have left you with an emptiness  and deep void asking WHY and trying to figure out how to change so you’re never left again but its just not possible. ONLY CHRIST CAN NEVER LEAVE NOR FORSAKE YOU!!! praying for myself and all of you!! Love you :)

We are to be proud of who we are and how God created us. We live in such a cruel broken world that despises God’s Truth and Light especially those it emits from! The lord loves us even when this world doesn’t!! I have been struggling all my life to accept this truth because of all the rejection, abandonment, and hurt that I have experienced throughout my years of life. I have had to learn not to play the victim card and to accept responsibility for whatever may come my way. The lord knows this world will reject me but he is not concerned about that, He is more concerned with the posture of my heart towards people especially in those hurtful situations. I can’t control how others will treat me but I CAN CONTROL how I RESPOND. The brokenness in another person does not DEFINE me. If they choose to not accept me or if worse yet I become attached and intimate with them whether friends or a significant other and they then abandon me or reject me, I should be able to forgive myself for past mistakes made because it says in the Bible when I accepted Jesus Christ as my savior I was then already forgiven. Its my pride that says Jesus dying on the cross is still somehow not enough for my sins and mistakes and if you feel the same it is time to repent and HUMBLY ACCEPT the Lord’s love, grace, truth acceptance, mercy and more!! Those people may have left you with an emptiness and deep void asking WHY and trying to figure out how to change so you’re never left again but its just not possible. ONLY CHRIST CAN NEVER LEAVE NOR FORSAKE YOU!!! praying for myself and all of you!! Love you :)

Seriously when did little man grow up?!?! #wheredoesthetimego

Seriously when did little man grow up?!?! #wheredoesthetimego

You know you are the mother of a little boy when you find things like this in your purse!! #littledino #boys&theirtoys

You know you are the mother of a little boy when you find things like this in your purse!! #littledino #boys&theirtoys

Got this little backpack for Ethan today!! So cute #lovethislittleboy!

Got this little backpack for Ethan today!! So cute #lovethislittleboy!

Sigh!! The first #Porsche I’ve ever seen like this! #thisislove #carlove #drooling

Sigh!! The first #Porsche I’ve ever seen like this! #thisislove #carlove #drooling

Made this creation myself pretty excited!! :) #bored@work #techgeek #instagramlove #Bible

Made this creation myself pretty excited!! :) #bored@work #techgeek #instagramlove #Bible

So grateful for the work the Lord is doing in my heart lately! Hard but soooo good! Also grateful for awesome God fearing Christians all over the world that are reppin’ Christ! Thank you @instagodministries  for encouraging me today! #followthem

So grateful for the work the Lord is doing in my heart lately! Hard but soooo good! Also grateful for awesome God fearing Christians all over the world that are reppin’ Christ! Thank you @instagodministries for encouraging me today! #followthem

Ahh!! My fav. Part about working on Ventura blvd. This is the 3rd Ferrari I have seen today!! #carlove #fancyfeet #droptop

Ahh!! My fav. Part about working on Ventura blvd. This is the 3rd Ferrari I have seen today!! #carlove #fancyfeet #droptop